Author Archives: jdtharp

Absolutely nothing…

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There really is absolutely nothing new going at the moment. I’m starting to plan the transition from my current job to my new one and the corresponding move down the hall. Winston is doing well (15 pounds at the vet this past Monday). I’m enjoying a terribly good cup of local coffee and the weather this weekend should be nice enough to starting getting the yard in shape or putting down some fresh mulch.

Don’t worrky, I’ll let you know when some asshat comes along later today and shoots my good mood all to hell.

Things I’m tired of seeing in the news…

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1) The price of gas. Yes, it’s $3.20 a gallon. It is what it is. Instead of bitching about it when someone shoves a camera in your face, maybe you should consider trading in the armored personnel carrier you use to take Bobby and Katie to soccer practice and get something more efficient. Otherwise, suck it up and pay the bill, sweetheart.

2) The “outrageous” cost of healthcare. You’re paying for a service. If you don’t like the going price, find a cheaper service or try just going without and see how that works out for you. Some things are worth a premium. Living is one of them.

3) The stock market “collapse.” I don’t know what economics or finance classes you took in college, but I distinctly remember learning that the price of stocks moves in both directions. If you were so heavily invested in one thing (i.e. stocks versus bonds versus gold), you need to learn about diversifying your portfolio. The market is doing what it does. I didn’t hear anyone bitching when it was soaring past all reasonable expectation.

Dyson…

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I never in my worst nightmares thought I could get all hot and bothered by cleaning equipment, but I picked up a Dyson vacuum at Target this morning… and oh my frigging god. I had no idea there was so much disgusting stuff in my carpet. I generally think of myself as a meticulous cleaner, so I was actually a little disturbed at the amount of stuff this thing picked up. I filled the canister just going over the living room. And then I filled it again. Twice. My old vacuum was no slouch, but this one is clearly making an impression.

I know it’ll wear off in time, but right now, I’m totally hot for this vacuum.

Suburban Motorcross…

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I don’t have a problem with kids who ride motorcycles. I mean I was one of them growing up. I was a holy terror on my little Honda and even later on my four-wheeler. Of course as a kid my house backed up to thousands of uninterrupted acres of places to ride. There was a time when I knew trails that would take me from Frostburg to Westernport in an afternoon’s ride. With that being said, I don’t know what would possess a parent to give their kid a dirt bike in a subdivision of ¼ acre lots.

I don’t fault the kid for ripping and tearing around the cul-de-sacs, but I sure as hell have a problem with the parents who are teaching him that it’s ok. I’m not gonna be the guy who calls and gets the kid in trouble with the law, but I wish there was some legal way to smack his parents in the back of the head. I’m just saying, if you want little Billy to be the next Motocross champion, maybe you should have considered buying a house that was… I don’t know… outside the city limits? Asshats.

Commands they don’t teach…

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So, we’re doing pretty well with the basic commands like sit and down and even making a little progress on the all important stay. I’ve been doing my research and can’t come up with a way to teach the one command that I really need. With the puppy biting and chewing on anything that comes in proximity to his mouth the one command I really want to be use is “stop being an asshole.”

That’s right. I said it. I want the single all purpose command that stops everything cold. No luck in finding it yet, but you can damned well believe that I’ll keep working on it… Especially when my hand becomes a wonderfully human-flavored interactive chew toy.

Satisfaction is…

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Apparently with a new puppy around, satisfaction is largely a moment of tranquility while your new best friend is laying on his bed next to your desk while you post comments on MySpace. If this becomes SOP, Winston is so totally going to rock at being my dog! As an added perk, he snores like an itty bitty chainsaw!

Yeah, I know his sleeping now probably means he’ll want to stay up half the night, but give me my moment, damnit.

Good Report…

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I’m happy to say that Winston came home from the vet this evening with a fabulous report. Everything sounds and looks good, which is a relief, particularly as my good friend April points out, bulldogs are notoriously prone to a number of respiratory and joint problems. Hopefully his (and my) good luck will hold. The vet wore him out and midnight bathroom breaks are wearing me out! It’s soooo time for a nap!

It’s small and furry… and no, it’s not the damned Easter Bunny.

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I’ll be doing a little reshuffling of my schedule for the next few months in order to accommodate the addition of a new fuzzball to my household. Everyone say hello to Winston (and WInstonPuppydon’t blame me for lack of creativity, his paperwork went in before I got him). I was leading more towards Wellington or William, personally. Don’t let the rotund little guy fool you, he’s a bundle of energy when he’s awake. He’s bully through and through. The timing wasn’t exactly how I had planned to make an addition, but when opportunity presents itself, I suppose we have to take advantage. More pics as I manage to take them.