Tag Archives: election

What Annoys Jeff this Week?

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1. Headsets. Due to some obscure security regulations that are probably being misinterpreted anyway, one of the most dysfunctional parts of spending my day in cubicle hell is being tethered to my computer with some kind of low-budget call center headset that only covers one ear and features a snazzy swing down boom mic. It’s exactly the kind of thing I wore for the three days I was a telemarketer in 1999. It’s bad enough with the fluorescent lighting and no windows, but being required to listen to your music or podcasts in one ear and the random conversations, phone calls, and background office noise of all your colleagues in the other really just adds insult to injury.

2. Meetings. The rise of Teams and other “collaboration tools” during the Great Plague era has made it entirely too easy for people to call a meeting when, in fact, no meeting needs to take place. Instead of a three- or four-line email, though, what we end up with is a calendar populated with 30 minute blocks of mostly wasted time. I earnestly implore you, if you are considering sending out a meeting request, to stop and really consider whether a simple email would convey the same message without carving big chunks out of everyone’s day.

3. Options. Donald Trump is sitting through the first of what will likely be many criminal trials he faces as a cast out one term president. Joe Biden dodders his way through every TV appearance and barely gives the impression of being awake. In a spectacular “hold my beer” moment, Robert Kennedy Jr. enters the chat with a worm eating his brain. These are the major contenders in 2024 for the highest office under the United States Constitution. In this country of approaching 300 million people, these are the best we could find to serve as our elected leader. If this is honestly the best we can do, maybe we really should just call it a day, because the republic has already failed and we’re just going through the motions.

The President of the United States meets the King of All Media…

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Howard Stern made his bones as a “shock jock” a million years ago. For the last 20 years, though, I’ve been following him because for my money he does the best celebrity interviews of any broadcaster of his generation. 

I usually only listen to Howard on the days he’s scheduled to be live – which is why I wasn’t tuned in last Friday when he broke into his own channel on SiriusXM to conduct an interview with President Biden. I did, however, take the time over the weekend to give it a proper listen. The King of All Media did his expected a yeoman’s job of preparing for and conducting an interview and drew out.

Look, even though he sat through a strong interview, I don’t want to give the impression that I’m suddenly enamored with Joe Biden. We still have significant policy differences, but since the guy still believes in the basics like fidelity to the Constitution and rule of law, it was good to see him trying an approach to outreach that that his predecessors studiously avoided.  

If you haven’t listened to the interview, I highly recommend checking it out. If you’re not a fan of Howard (or Joe), maybe this is the chance to take a look at one or both of them in a new context. Everything I learned about American politics when I was taking my degree seems to be hopelessly out of date, so I have no idea of this is the kind of thing that might move the needle seven months out from a general election. In any case, I’d say it’s still worth doing. If you’ve got some free time, give the King of All Media and the president a listen. You might find it as interesting as I did. 

What Annoys Jeff this Week?

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1. Summer clothes. It was warm over the weekend and I thought it was probably a good chance to go through some of my summer garb to see what still fits. Surely, I thought to myself, among my stack of tee shirts and shorts I’d find more than enough to get me through the hot weather. Yeah, no. Out of twelve pairs of shorts, there are two I can probably wear… if I keep my belt cinched really tight. Tee shirts were a bit of a better result, but not by much… as long as you don’t mind that oversized and baggy look. This means I’m being forced against a wall where I can’t avoid more goddamned shopping. Of all the things I’m loath to spend money one, clothes ranks not far off the top of the list. I need to find someone in Cecil County who offers personal shopping and stylist services, because I’d like to participate in this process as little as possible.

2. Rematch. Barring the unforeseen it appears that a rematch between Joe Biden and Donald Trump is inevitable. Every four years I say it, and every four years I mean it… I can’t imagine being less inspired to vote for a candidate than I am by the prospect of one of these two geriatrics running the country for the next four years. If, in the country of 300 million people, these are the best our nation has to offer, honest to god we should just pack up and call it a day. We’re not so much a country as a circus protected by a large standing army.

3. SoTU. This week will mark Joe Biden’s 3rd State of the Union Address. That’s pretty good for a guy who according to wackjob right wingers isn’t technically President of the United States. There was a time I’d have laid in the chips and dip and treated the State of the Union as an alternate reality Super Bowl. Sitting here now, though, I know there’s not a chance in hell I’m going to make any special effort to watch. The simple fact is, I can’t think of anything I’m interested in hearing Joe Biden say… and I’m even less eager to poison my ears with whatever treason-scented fuckery spews out of the Republican response.

Disgust and disdain…

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Just like that, election season 2024 is underway. As someone who’s had a passing interest in politics his entire life – and whose paycheck depends in large part on the elected “leaders” of the government not making the entire creaking edifice dysfunctional – I look on the entire spectacle with disgust and disdain. The thought of spending the next 24 months listening to these contemptible assholes stroking their own egos and stoking up the lowest common denominator among their respective bases just leaves me wanting to eat a cyanide sandwich and wash it down with an ice cold glass of bleach.

Maybe that’s slightly exaggerated. Maybe. It probably depends on the day when you ask me about it.

It’s like the classic car crash scenario… no matter how much I want to look away from the burning hot mess, I won’t. The shitshow in which we find ourselves caught has to be seen to be believed – or disbelieved – whichever happens to be your preference.

If they ever come up with a relatively non-invasive way to fry the little part of the brain that gives a shit about politics and leaves the rest undiminished, you can sure as shit find me in line on opening day.

What Annoys Jeff this Week?

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1. Still waiting. Here we are 6 weeks past the “end of max telework” world and the union, such as it is, still hasn’t come through on delivering the new and improved telework agreement. So, we’re still grinding along with only two days a week like pre-COVID barbarians… as if the last 30 months didn’t prove that working from home works. All this while hearing stories of other organizations tucked in next door that are offering their people four or five day a week work from home options. Gotta love working for the sick man of the enterprise. There’s probably plenty of blame to go around, but since the updated policy for supervisors was published six weeks ago, I’m going to continue to go ahead and put every bit of blame on Local 1904 for not getting this shit done.

2. Just a cold. I can’t tell you how many times this week I’ve heard, “oh, I know I look awful but it’s just a cold.” You’d think that over the last three years one thing we might have collectively learned is bringing your germs to an enclosed working environment maybe isn’t a great idea. But no. People are absolutely re-goddamned-diculous and operate under the illusion that this 200+ year old institution can’t possibly operate without them. It can. It has. And it will. Take your sick ass home and work from there if you think you’re that important. Jesus wept.

3. November surprise. In a surprise to no one but hard-core Republican partisans, it turns out that if you single mindedly pursue a laundry list of policies the majority of the electorate disagrees with, nominate a wide slate of candidates who redefine the phrase “sleazy politician,” and hew in lock step with a twice impeached former president who attempted to raise a rebellion against his own government, then come election day you might have a bad time of it. In a mid-term being held amidst historic inflation and economic angst, the party out of power should have walked away with big wins across the board. Republicans should have had a banner night. It turns out that policy still matters. Candidates still matter. Messaging is important. Even if the Republicans squeak out a majority in the House or Senate, this election should be a wakeup call. It probably won’t be. The true believers will double down and get even more loud and obnoxious. 

Fourteen election days…

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It’s election day. Again. It keeps coming back… like we’ve all collectively been eating bad oysters. If my math is right this will be my 14th election day as a registered voter.

This is the time when I usually do a little bit of prognostication. The only thing I still know with any certainty, though, is the “way it works” I learned 20+ years ago sitting in my American politics courses no longer feels particularly valid. From here on out, I’m going on sheer guess work. 

With that said, I think at the national level, Republicans are going to have a good night. The weird economic conditions are just too much headwind for the incumbent party to achieve much in the way of gain. If I were forced to call the ball, I’d say Republicans pick up 15 seats in the House and get +1 in the Senate… leaving us with the most divided of divided governments.

Locally, it feels like a foregone conclusion that the Democratic candidate will win the governor’s race. Andy Harris, the crank, crackpot, insurrection supporter, and all around shitty human being will retain his seat representing Maryland’s First Congressional District.

None of these are the results I want. Of course, I’ll never get the results I want because most of the candidates I’d really want to vote for have been dead for a very long time – a few for decades and others for centuries. 

The only thing I feel confident in saying is that our politics will continue to get worse. We’re not even going to take a breath when the polls close tonight before we’re off to the races and running for the 2024 election cycle. And in the process, we’re going to get exactly the kind of government we, the people, deserve… because we’ve allowed it to get this bad by continuing to send the same set of asshats back to do our work. 

My violently split ticket…

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For me, this past Saturday was Election Day. I double checked my printed ballot, did some last-minute research on a couple of candidates for local office, and filled in all the appropriate ovals. Then I trundled off to the county building and dropped off my ballot. In a few days I expect to get an email notification from the county board of elections that it has been received. I’ll get another when it gets counted. As much as I always enjoyed physically going to the polls in person, this new way of doing things is undeniably more convenient.

I’ve never shied away from splitting a ticket. Since I turned 18, my rule has always been to vote for the candidate rather than the party. This year, I had an even simpler rule – I refuse to cast a vote for any candidate that supported, excused, convoluted, or in any way attempted to justify the Republican-led insurrection of January 2020. I don’t have a single vote to give to election deniers, anti-vaxers, or conspiracy theorists. It led to a ticket split in a variety of ways.

For Maryland governor, I’d vote for a warm bucket of spit before I cast my ballot for Dan Cox. Chalk that one up for the Libertarian candidate.

For Maryland’s 1st Congressional District, I cheerfully voted for the Democratic candidate and against Andy Harris, our very own local election denying, insurrection supporting, Trump-ist incumbent representative. As a medical doctor, his stated position on vaccines is more than enough to ensure I can’t trust his judgement on other issues. His support for a violent overthrow of the legislative branch in which he serves was really just icing on the cake.  

For Comptroller, I actually voted for the Republican, not because he’s a Republican or because he has a chance of winning a statewide race in Maryland this year, but because at the height of Republican office holders dipping their toes in the water of treason, Barry Glassman called out Congressman Harris by name as an example of what was wrong with the Republican Party. If he’s willing to publicly stand against that running tide and agitate the MAGA base, he earned my vote.

The rest is a long list of state and local offices for which Republican candidates are running unopposed. A quick social media search on most of them led me quite quickly to using the write in option. So, there are a few Cecil County residents known to me personally to be of sound judgement who will be receiving at least one vote attempting to elevate them to high public office in lieu of the nominated Republican for those offices.

I’m absolutely confident that my ticket has never been more split.

What Annoys Jeff this Week?

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1. Eye strain. My eyes aren’t getting worse, the doc tells me. My prescription hasn’t changed now in three years. In response to my complaint about not being able to read deep into the night like I used to, “Your eyes are just getting old,” he says with a grin and the hint of a chuckle. Apparently looking at a computer all day and trying to read all night, is just straining the hell out of them, which is what’s making the world go all blurry after 8 PM every night. The fix, maybe, is to add a set of reading glasses to my current bifocal order. Theoretically, that will mean when I’m reading in the evenings, I won’t have to keep looking down through the bottom third of my lenses. If that doesn’t do it, we’ll order a set that really magnifies instead of just adjusting the focus for my crummy vision. I’d pretend to be indignant, but at this point I’m willing to try most anything to get the situation corrected or even just improved.

2. Autumn. We’ll see the first few hours of autumn today. I don’t particularly mind the onset of cooler weather, but I resent the hell out of the days getting shorter. If feels like losing a lot more than we’re gaining for the trouble. This time of year always comes along with a certain nagging black dog. History tells me he’ll be around for the next 10 or 12 weeks. I’ll perk up a bit at the solstice, when we’ve gone over the hump and days lengthen instead of grow shorter – with its promise of gaining something rather than losing it. Until then, I’ll simply go through the day with a slightly increased baseline level of aggravation. It’s probably not so much that anyone would notice, but I’ll damned well know it.

3. People. Donald Trump is easy to mock. He’s a twice impeached reality television star-in-chief who spent his final days in office plotting the undoing of our republican form of government and when caught red handed begged his followers not to believe the evidence seen by their own lying eyes. As we’ve learned over the last seven years of his candidacy, his term of office, and his post-presidential career, that’s just Donald being Donald. The really troublesome bit is the people, who despite all evidence – or perhaps because of it – still rally to the call of this disgraced carnival barker. Make no mistake, there’s still enough of them, added to critical mass of those who are simply ambivalent, that it’s entirely possible he’ll be on the ballot two years from now. You can’t blame the former host of The Celebrity Apprentice for that part. It’s only a possibility because people are gullible, too invested in the narrative to be open to new information, or too stuck on their pride to admit they’ve been misled and find another way ahead.  

On brand…

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I was having a text conversation this morning with someone who was decrying the increased likelihood of political violence following the upcoming midterm election. Given the level of Republican fuckery over the last few years and the already demonstrated propensity towards violence of the extremist element among them, I’d say it’s almost unavoidable. Perhaps it won’t be immediately following the next election, but sooner or later I fully expect to see levels of domestic terrorism in the United States on par with The Troubles in Northern Ireland in the last half of the 20th century.

It’s not a future I’m particularly looking forward to, but it feels definitively on brand for America. We are, after all, a country founded in part due to a violent rebellion against a three-penny tax. In 1794, the ink of our Constitution barely dried, federalized troops were called out to put down a rebellion in Western Pennsylvania, again, over taxation. Sixty years later, we fought a bloody, four-year civil war. All the years before and after are pock marked with acts of individual and group violence. It ebbs and flows as a common thread through the history of the Republic.

I can’t deny the nagging feeling that we’re on another up swing towards conditions that will almost certainly be worse than anything seen in living memory. Just because we haven’t personally experienced it, though, we shouldn’t pretend that this is something altogether new and different. The only real question in my mind now is whether this generation will develop the will and personal fortitude of a Washington or Lincoln and put down this latest accumulation of rabble before they manage to do any lasting damage.