No matter what they say, people from the Inspector General’s office are never here to help you. I’m not saying they’re necessarily the goon squad, but having them lurk around the office is a little like having a couple of buzzards circling over your house. Sure, maybe there isn’t a dead body buried in the back yard, but something sure smells rotten back there. Even if you’re not the one who caused it, life is going to get mighty uncomfortable for a while. My best advice is seek cover and make yourself unobtrusive as they shit all over everything.
Editorial Note: This part of a continuing series of posts previously available on a now defunct website. They are appearing on http://www.jeffreytharp.com for the first time. This post has been time stamped to correspond to its original publication date.