Tag Archives: convenience

What Annoys Jeff this Week?

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Just because I’m on vacation doesn’t mean the annoyances stop coming. What? You think just because there’s sand in my shoes I’m suddenly going to be all lollypops and sunshine over here? Right. Anyway, here it goes in no particular order:

1. The parade. Apparently every fire truck in the state of Maryland was here yesterday for a parade. Usually that’s fine. Parades aren’t my kind of entertainment, but people seem to like them, so whatever. At least it’s whatever until it’s an endless line of flashing lights and baton twirlers between you and the hotel you’re trying to check in to. After 45 minutes of looking surly and inching towards the crowd with my bumper, the guy watching the intersection took mercy and waved my across even though the Tundra only has a passing resemblance to a fire truck. Thank God for small mercies.

2. Key cards. I’m sure for hotels they are a vast improvement over losing physical keys and replacing guest room locks on a regular basis. For customers they’re usually convenient too. Except when they aren’t… which in some cases is apparently all the time. I don’t have any real issue with electronic locks, it would just be nice if they were consistent. After a long schlep back up the boards, the last thing I want to do is drag myself down to the front desk for a 3rd time in 24 hours because the key doesn’t work.

3. Traffic lights. Again, probably a pretty useful invention… when they’re set to coincide with the flow of traffic, rather than fight it at every turn (if you’ll excuse the pun). I’m perfectly ok with stopping at every 3rd of 5th light, but getting caught up in every single one is a bit of a stretch. It’s a crowded town. There are a lot of people fighting over every inch of the place, how about we make at least getting from Point A to Point B a smidge easier for everyone?

What Annoys Jeff this Week?

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1. Faxing. It’s the Year of Our Lord Two Thousand Twelve. There is absolutely no reason why anyone should need to do business via fax. Better yet was the suggestion that if I couldn’t find a fax machine, I could just come in and sign the paperwork in person any time between 8AM and 4PM. Seriously? Did I suddenly wake up in 1989? Maybe you should just scan it into a pdf and email it to me like a normal person so I don’t have to scour the building looking for fax machine to blow the dust off.

2. Banker’s Hours. Look, if you’re in the service industry working from 8AM and 4PM and then only on weekdays might not be your best-ever idea… Especially if you want other working people (you know the ones with jobs and disposable income) to actually be able to use your service. You might be the best in the business, but I’m not leaving work early just to talk to you. Instead, I’ll go with your next best competitor who has office hours on Saturday or who can be available in the evening after working stiffs wrap up for the day.

3. Rental Car Agencies. Have you ever tried renting a car on short notice on a Saturday? Here’s a bit of advice from your kindly Uncle Jeff: Don’t bother. They’re not going to have anything available. Then they’re going to refer you to one of their sister offices a few miles away. That office won’t have any cars either. By the time they refer you to the fourth office that’s 37 miles away, you’ll have lost interest. So yeah, if you’re going to need a rental car in a hurry, make sure you identify that requirement at least two days in advance of knowing that you’ll need it. Schmucks.

Boxes, boxes everywhere…

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Back in January, I was operating under the assumption that a move was just around the corner. In an effort to save time later, I set about boxing up those things that were “non-essential” and that I could live without for a few weeks during the transition period. What I anticipated being a few weeks, has drug out over two months now and is well on its way to shattering the three month mark before anything resembling a move takes place.

It seems I may have jumped the gun a bit on being prepared. The spare bedroom? Sure, that’s not a problem. I never spent any time in there anyway. The DVDs? OK, but I’m starting to feel the pain on that one. The biggest problem in this premature packing extravaganza is that every tool and general household item I own is boxed up and stacked neatly in the corner of the garage.

Need a light bulb? It’s in a box. Screwdriver? In a box. I’ve learned an important lesson here. Many of the things I have laying around the house are definitely non-essential… for a few weeks. Anything more than that and it gets to be a downright inconvenient proposition. So far, I’m resisting the temptation to crack open the boxes and making due with a Swiss army knife and Leatherman as household fix it tools. I’m reading a lot more to make up for the DVD’s now stacked up behind the couch. Unpacking these boxes even just to alleviate some bit of inconvenience would be like admitting defeat on some level… but I shall never surrender.

Right back where we started from…

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Suffice to say that I have decided not to peruse the house in rural Tennessee that I had been drooling over last weekend. Upon further reflection, I determined that I was not quite willing to give up the comforts of Starbucks, $.99 dry cleaning, dining, and other options that are available living closer to the a major urban center. I think I liked the idea of living in the country more than I liked the actual prospect of doing it.

Houses are a little like women in that you never really seem to forget your first love. So, my friends, we’re going back to the beginning of this little saga… to the little house, on a tree-lined street, that started it all. After further review, I need to disregard the god-awful paint that the current owner has inflicted on the place and marvel instead at the original woodwork. The place apparently comes complete with individual and neighborhood listing on the National Register and is about as respectable an area in Memphis as you’re going to find… You can make you jokes about Memphis being the 2nd (or 4th) most dangerous city in America, but this is an area of college professors and white collar “old house people.” The first time I saw the place, I was bowled over by how much hadn’t been changed. Tomorrow I’m going in to find the warts.

Wish me luck.