There are two things I’ve discovered for sure in the exciting world of self publishing: 1) Nothing is as easy or straightforward as it appears; and 2) You will find a typo about 37 seconds after hitting “publish.” Still, getting from the barest notion of an idea to an actual printed book has been a real experience. Since I’ve turned my personal brand of snark and sarcasm loose on the world, the lest I can do now is stand behind it and bother as many people as possible to get behind the effort with me…
That’s why I’m please to announce to you today that Nobody Told Me… The Cynic’s Guide for New Employees is now available in paperback from Createspace for the low, low price of $7.99 (+3.52 shipping and handling of course). I might be biased, but I think it would still be a deal at twice the price.
For Amazon Prime members, the paperback should be available through Amazon in the next week if you want to save the shipping costs. As soon as I’ve got confirmation back from Amazon, I’ll post a notification here and on my Facebook Fan Page.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to step away from the keyboard, fix a strong drink, and take a breath.
OK, so the alternate title for this post was going to be “The post in which the author gets sentimental…”, but in deference to Queen, I decided to steal their title shamelessly. Regardless, haggling over the title isn’t the point of this particular post. What the point is, however, is what an unexpectedly intense feeling it is holding a book your slavishly worked over for eighteen months in your hands for the first time. Sure, I’ve been dealing with the electronic version for the last few weeks, and with what feels like dozens of Word drafts for months before that, but there is a certain reality to having the physical book in your hand. Having mostly gone “all in” to the electronic world for my own reading, I’d be lying if I said this didn’t catch me off guard. I’d been looking at it mostly as one more avenue to reach people who hadn’t adopted e-readers yet and maybe talk it into a few local book stores as just an ego rub. What I found is something altogether different – after cutting away the brown cardboard wrapper, what I had wasn’t a collection of files, cover art, and a sales pitch. I had a book.
I don’t have any point of comparison for what standing in the kitchen holding the proof, tired from working all day with allergies making life miserable, was really like. Not being a particularly expressive guy at the best of times, all I can say is that I had a moment yesterday. It was one of those across a crowded room, golf shot, lighting strike moments. All I know for sure is I want that feeling again… and again… and again. It’s gotta be what that first line of cocaine is like. It’s an incredible, intensely personal high. I’ve got to write more. I’ve got to get that high again. Maybe it’s never as good as your first, but I get the feeling I’m never going to stop chasing it. I don’t know that I can stop chasing it now even if I wanted to.
I really only ever planned to produce Nobody Told Me… The Cynic’s Guide for New Employees as an ebook. Representing the fastest and most direct method of putting text into hands, I wasn’t sure I wanted to go to the added time and effort of putting together a print edition. A few emails and Facebook posts, though, prompted me into action. Since I’ve been home anyway, I started tinkering around with Createspace too see what a print book might look like. As it turns out, the fine people at Createspace (a tiny little subsidiary of Amazon) have gotten the process down to a bit of a science. When you’re a one man show, doing the writing, layout, publication, and publicity yourself and on less than a shoestring budget, there’s a fine line between making smart decisions and making decisions that mostly just serve your own vanity. Conveniently, the Amazon family of businesses have made it relatively easy to feed both beasts at once.
So there you have it, in the space of about six hours I accidentally became a paperback writer; or to be more exact, I submitted everything to Createspace and anticipate being a paperback writer in 24-48 hours. Now, don’t get too excited just yet. Once they aprove my work, I have to order a proof, wait for it to get here, make sure it isn’t all jacked up and/or make a billion and a half changes, and wait for clean copy before posting any links or letting it loose for distribution through Amazon and it’s affiliates. I don’t know whether to expect this to be a two week or two month process, but whatever comes if it, you’ll hear it here first.