Around the eyes…

I went for my annual eye exam on Friday. Wilmer was well organized, prompt, thorough, and personal. It was not cheap, but I was pleased with the Hopkins approach to eye care. I supposed that’ll just be where I go from now on.

I got a good report of no eye disease present… which is a nice change from the rest of this year’s medical appointments. I have, however, earned a bump up of my magnification that will hopefully make the evening reading a bit easier.

I really hadn’t planned on my blog becoming all medical all the time, but that feels like it’s been my theme for the last four months. Maybe eventually I’ll get back to bitching and complaining about normal day to day stuff, but it feels like today isn’t that day… and tomorrow isn’t looking so good either.

My lying eyes…

I’ve worn glasses since I was in 7th grade – meaning I’ve had them now far longer than I ever lived without them. They feel like a natural extension of my face at this point. 

My prescription has changed over the years, but for the last decade or so has been fairly stable. That’s why it was painfully obvious early this year that I was struggling to keep the small print in focus. What’s worse, after long sessions with the book of the day, I’m regularly finding the words blurring together and my eyes just too tired to focus on anything that’s not halfway across the room.

It hasn’t been debilitating, but has been thoroughly annoying and disheartening from day-to-day as it sets limits on how many pages I can get through in a sitting. I don’t make a habit of living in fear, but if there’s anything in life that causes me an unreasonable amount of dread, it’s the idea of losing my vision. It’s precisely the kind of perverse plot twist the Olympians would devise for me. 

I took a few hours of sick leave this morning and schlepped over for my annual eye exam and diagnostic for this new issue. This appointment has been on the schedule for months and given the sum of other circumstances in this plague summer it’s one I would have probably cancelled… but since current situation is standing between me and fully enjoying the books, I’m 100% willing to risk painful, suffocating death to get it resolved.

As it turns out, Doc assures me I’m not, in fact, going blind… but it’s yet another instance of bodily succumbing to the ravages of middle age. My fancy new transition lenses should be here in about two weeks. 

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go find some tennis balls to put on the legs of my walker.

What Annoys Jeff this Week?

1. Paying cash. There’s a time and a place for cash. I carry it myself. However, the toll plaza at rush hour is neither the time nor the place. That’s the time and place where you should suck it up and order an E-ZPass so you can keep moving through the booth while the toll is automatically deducted from your account. I’m sure you have some very good reason like it being a privacy violation or you’re too lazy to use the internet, but no one has the time to wait around behind you while you try to scrape together $8 in loose change.

2. Strategy. Time was in this country when the chief executive said he had a strategy that meant he had a grand vision for the role the country should play in world affairs. Monroe, Lincoln, Truman, Reagan, and even Bush (43) were able to clearly articulate how they wanted to use American power. Apparently now the grand vision is to tiptoe around the hard issues, not try too hard, and for God’s sake avoid offending the international community in any way. It might be an approach, but it’s not what I’d call strategy.

3. Ray Rice and Mrs. Ray Rice. He’s a dirtbag and she’s dumb enough to not just stay with him, but publicly defend him too. News reported. Could we now please move on to paying attention to something that matters?

Eyes…

I’ve been wearing glasses since 7th grade. It’s been so long that I don’t even think of them as equipment so much as they are just another appendage like arms and legs. They’re like eyes on the outside of your head. On second thought, scratch that last part. The imagery there is a little off-putting.

Up until Friday, I thought my corrected vision was just fine. I legitimately hadn’t noticed anything change and have even commented that I didn’t think I needed anything aside from a new set of frames. Then of course there’s the moment of truth when the doc gave me the side by side comparison of the glasses I’m wearing now to my new prescription. Ouch. That would be a definite fail for the Mk 1 Eyeball, even with its upgraded external hardware kit.

Admittedly, it’s been two years since my last exam, so I shouldn’t be surprised that things had changed a bit. I just hate how they sneak up on you like that. It’s a bit like being the frog who just noticed his pot of water is getting uncomfortably warm. I’ve got a bad feeling it’s like the lady said… getting old ain’t for sissies.